Sunday 5 April 2020

18 months Post Roaccutane

I cannot believe that it has now been 18 months since I finished roaccutane. After being on it was over 8 months it pretty much consumed the whole of my 2018. However, it was the best thing I have ever done for myself, and that is no exaggeration. I sometimes forget just how bad my skin was. When you are living with it in the moment, life just goes by and you learn not to let it bother you. It was a big risk, and it was difficult at times. In all honesty, after the process had finished I was absolutely terrified that in a matter of weeks my skin would return to its previous spotty self. I have not had any cystic breakouts since I have come off it. My skin used to be the worst around my time of the month when my skin would rage. I have had a few minimal pesky red spots around my chin area but nothing which a little bit of concealer can't handle.

In all honesty whilst the process was happening I always had an end goal. I did not anticipate how I would feel in the pending months after it had all finished. In March 2019, I went for a three month follow up appointment with my dermatologist. He was really happy with my skin, and said that if I was going to have a major outbreak it would have hopefully have happened by now. I am still a little dubious every day that I will wake up and my skin will have to started to erupt. It is like anything in life, you learn to live with things. Having acne is what sprouted my love of makeup and the start of this blog. I saw all these girls with perfect skin and there was no one I could really relate to at the time except Em Ford (mypaleskin). She has been on her own battle with acne for years and I could relate to her so much. My favourite part of being acne free is in that in the summer I now leave the house with nothing on my skin. Previously when it was hot even though I had grown a lot with my self-confidence, I always put some concealer or foundation on before stepping out the door. I think as you grow into your 20's and people realise it is no longer just teenage acne, people are genuinely confused by the idea of adult acne.

One of my friends who has had her own health battles said she didn't know me pre acne treatment. I said I'd show her a picture when it was at its worst and I was just starting my treatment. I found it very strange showing her those pictures as it was a distant memory. I felt as though all those years which I battled with my acne had just disappeared. It has definitely changed my life for the better. I know people have much worse health conditions, and I very much accepted in the end it was just some spots on my face. I count my blessings that all it took was some medication to get mine sorted and that some people don't respond to roaccutane at all. I think as I am a success story I would always recommend it, but before I went on it I did a lot of research and my dermatologist laid out in black and white the high chances of some of the side effects. I had had this acne since 13, so 10 years on it was just an experiment for me as my dermatologist had said it was time to try it. I had literally tried every cream and antibiotic available with minimal results. I have written a full diary of my roaccutane journey from the start, during and after which outlines clearly the dosage and process at each point.

Now 18 months on, and approaching 26 I definitely have found a new confidence in myself. It is so strange as I still naturally gravitate to full coverage concealers and foundations. I have also had to adjust to my skincare choices as I have gone from having oily skin to very dry skin that needs all the moisture it can possibly get. It makes me feel a little emotional as I know how deep down during the whole time of having acne, I just tried to ignore it on a daily basis. All mine stemmed down to after all those years of trying different options was a diagnosis of polycystic ovaries. Once that was confirmed with blood tests and an ultrasound, the dermatologist knew the hormonal cause of my acne and the treatment could start. There is a tiny part of me who wonders why it took 10 years of dermatology testing, for a GP to determine my underlying condition. However, in the grand scheme of things it all got completely sorted in the end. I am so grateful that it worked so well and that I am still acne free.


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